I usually write the little “what happened last week in too-many-plotsville” thing from memory at the beginning of each post, but this time I had to suffer re-reading the end of chapter nine because I seriously had no idea. But oh yeah, Zoey’s grandma is apparently in grave danger, and we know this thanks to Aphrodite’s vision. [Matthew says: Place bets on how long this will be the plot for! One chapter? TWO chapters?]
Chapter 10
“So why can’t we tell Neferet about this mess? All she’d have to do is make a few calls, like she did last month when Aphrodite had a vision about that plane going down at the Denver airport,” Damien said, careful to keep his voice low.
This is one of the few times Damien has just been allowed to have a normal, sensible line without it being about him being gay.
Also, he’s completely right. If it’s that easy to prevent impending doom, like just with a phone call, then why wasn’t Zoey’s phone call to her grandmother in the last chapter enough? Or a phone call from any other person/vampyre aside from Neferet? Obviously Damien isn’t aware they Zoey’s gut has been preventing her from going to Neferet for help, so his plan is pretty sensible. [Matthew says: Well, Zoey's concern isn't just her grandmother's life, but trying to stop any accident from happening on the bridge at all, so - can't believe I'm writing this - I'm on Zoey's side here.]
The gang speculates on whether they can trust Aphrodite and whether she might be either fabricating the whole thing or withholding crucial information. As with everything else in this series, the issue is simply put to rest by Zoey saying that everyone just needs to trust her intuition. Zoey’s gut somehow has become more of a character than the twins. Not that this is very hard to achieve, but I thought it was worth pointing out. [Matthew says: Double the characters, half the character!] In fact, Zoey’s gut may be an even bigger Mary-Sue than she is. It gets nothing wrong!
The conversation shifts to discussing how they can prevent anyone from dying on the bridge of disasters. Aphrodite’s vision wasn’t clear enough to show exactly what happens to the bridge, so Zoey and her friends decide to call in a bomb threat. I have to say when I was trying to guess what would happen in this book, this was not on the top of my list. [Matthew says: My list of House of Night 2: Vampyre Boogaloo predictions went something like, 1) boy drama, 2) poopie, 3) Damien's sexual orientation.]
Now, all that’s left is to find a disposable phone – oh, Damien has one… wait, there can’t possibly be a way to tie his having a disposable phone to him being gay, right?
“Here”—Damien pulled a big dorky looking Nokia out of his pocket—”use mine.”
“Why do you have a disposable?” I studied the phone. It looked fairly normal.
“I got it after my parents freaked about me being gay. Until I was Marked and came here it felt like they were grounding me for life from life. I mean, not that I really expected them to lock me in a closet somewhere, but it’s good to be prepared. Since then I’ve made sure I always have one.”
None of us knew what to say. It really sucked that Damien’s parents were so psycho about him being gay.
WHAT DOES HAVING A DISPOSABLE PHONE HAVE TO DO WITH THIS?! It was like the Casts felt so awful about giving Damien one normal line that they had to immediately find any possible fucking ridiculous way to remind us. Even if you could possibly believe why he had one before he came to House of Night, why would he STILL have this in his pocket right this very minute? New low, Casts, new low. [Matthew says: Even if you believe that he just carries around this emergency secret cell phone in case his parents lock him in a closet even though he no longer lives with his parents (which I'm pretty sure the BBGT consensus is "we don't"), if they're going through the trouble of taking away his regular cell phone, they're probably not going to overlook cell phone #2: cellular booga- okay, I have no idea where these Electric Boogaloo jokes keep coming from today.]
But who they gonna call? Hint, the answer is sadly not Ghost Busters!
Damien said quickly. “We don’t want any kind of computer trail. You just need to call the local branch of the FBI. That’ll be in the phone book. They’ll do whatever it is they do when freaks call.”
If Travis Maddox shows up to this crime scene, no one will be safe. No one.
Also, is there really a local FBI branch in the phone book? This seems completely impossible, but the Casts couldn’t possibly make up something that dumb? I would normally just take the time to Google this, but I need to go very very shortly and can’t be asked. [Matthew says: Also you don't want to leave any kind of computer trail.]
Suddenly, Neferet shows up and says detectives are here to talk to Zoey. They begin interrogating her about the two missing boys and also about Heath and Kayla for some reason. [Matthew says: At least they're not like the detectives from Hush, Hush who only interrogate the teen girl main character about the love triangle. They're doing two things!] Zoey recounts the last book for us because the Casts got bored of the other plot and decided to just tell us about the old ones again. The end of the chapter has this happen, and I guess it’s supposed to be a twist?
“And how about this, Miss Redbird? Have you ever seen this before?” He handed me the bag and I realized what was in it. It was a silver pendant on a long black velvet ribbon. The pendant was in the shape of two crescent moons back-to-back against a full moon encrusted with garnets. It was the symbol of the triple Goddess—mother, maiden, and crone. I had one just like it because it was the necklace that the leader of the Dark Daughters.
OH MA GERRRRD. Gasp shock horror! Arrest her immediately!!
Tagged: books, fiction, Funny, House of Night, Humor, young adult
