I don’t often post about my personal life on here because this isn’t about me, it’s about the bad books, but I’m really excited to announce I’m getting married on April 27th! Matt and I haven’t ironed out the details yet, but this means I’ll probably be taking some time off that week to chill with my husband-to-be and my family who are flying in for the ceremony.

The part I’m most excited about, though, is that my fiance and I are on the same page when it comes to what’s most important to us. Hiring a lawyer and paying for my upcoming visa fees were super high priority (and an awesome honeymoon), which made all the other stuff seem pretty insignificant in comparison. Now, I can totally understand why this stuff is important and awesome to a lot of people, so please don’t take offence that I personally would never want to spend a pretty penny on an engagement ring/wedding/dress/wedding rings/invitations/decorations.

Engagement ring: £10 from Accessorise (I was promised an onion ring 3 years ago, and we did eat some the other night, so I guess that counts?)

Wedding dress: £7.99

Ceremony: ~£200 (I can’t remember exactly, but it’s around that.)

Wedding rings: ~£35-70

That’s my version of a dream wedding.

Captivated by You Chapter 7: Gideon

Gideon heads over to Eva and Cary’s apartment and finds a distraught Eva. She tells Gideon about Megumi’s situation, and Giedeon somehow makes it about himself.

The mention of bondage put me on alert. I ran my hand down her back and tucked her tighter against me. I was nothing if not patient in aligning my desires with her fears. Setbacks were expected and accommodated, but I didn’t want someone else’s misadventures to create new hurdles for Eva and me to face.

What in fuck’s name is he on about? Why on Earth would Megumi’s completely unrelated situation create new hurdles for Eva and Gideon? I know that these two are always on the lookout for new hurdles to overcome no matter how un-hurdley they are, but this is a huge reach. Gideon and Eva have played around with BDSM a couple times, but I can’t remember Gideon’s desires not aligning with Eva’s. [Matthew says: BDSM-wise, anyway. Most of these guys’ desires do not align, when you think about it.]

Eva explains Megumi’s situation to Gideon, and he proceeds to both completely miss the point and be a misogynistic piece of shit the way only Gideon can.

“That’s the thing.” She pulled away and faced me. “I went over it with Megumi. She said no—a lot—until he gagged her. He got off on her pain, Gideon. And now he’s terrorizing her with texts and photos he took of her that night. She’s asked him to stop, but he won’t. He’s sick. Something’s wrong with him.”

I weighed how best to respond. I went with blunt. “Eva. She broke it off, and then took him back. He might not realize she’s serious this time.”

Let me try to follow Gideon’s seriously flawed logic. Megumi stops seeing a guy, gives him another chance, decides to try BDSM with him, is pushed to limits she’s uncomfortable with and clearly tells the guy no until she physically can’t anymore, but it’s her fault because maybe mixed signals?? “Megumi, you said no once and changed your mind, so I can only assume every ‘no’ out of your mouth is unclear at best.” [Matthew says: I hate to say this, but I see what Gideon’s point is about why this guy might be still causing trouble. I don’t see how it’s relevant at this exact moment in time, since that’s not really what this conversation is about, but a broken male ego clock is right twice a day. Just not right now, because why the fuck would you say that NOW? And what is HE angry at EVA about?]

“Don’t make excuses for him! She’s bruised everywhere. It’s been a week and the bruises are still dark. She couldn’t sit down for days!”

“I’m not excusing him.” I stood with her. “I would never justify an abuser—you know that. I don’t have the whole story, but I know your story. Her situation isn’t like yours. Nathan was an aberration.”

What does this have to do with Nathan or Eva’s situation? This is a situation where it’s very clear that something bad and traumatic has happened to a friend of Eva’s. If Gideon is tying to imply that Eva can’t make that distinction because of her own traumatic past, he’s way out of line. I don’t think Eva is more prone to misjudge a situation as being harmful, rather she’s in a situation where she can probably recognize it better than anyone else, and quite frankly I’m surprised Gideon is acting this way.

Eva and Gideon then get into an argument because Gideon wants Eva to stay out of it, and when Eva tells him she’s asked Clancy (who works for her mother and stepfather) to look into the situation, Gideon gets pissed that she didn’t ask his guy Raul.

He also presents a somewhat convoluted argument that by asking someone who works for her stepfather to help her out, she’s just asking her mother to invade her privacy more. And also this:

“You sent a trained professional to ‘talk’ to this guy. But you didn’t fully assess the possibility of blowback. If you’d tapped Raúl to help you, he would’ve known to be extra vigilant.” My jaw clenched. “Damn it, Eva. Don’t make it hard for me to keep you safe!”

WHAT DOES ANY OF THIS GARBLED NONSENSE MEAN?

Gideon goes on for awhile about how he’s obsessed with Eva and protecting her, but he’s still not as important to her as he wants to be.

“You come home to another guy. You make your living by working for someone else. I’m not as necessary to you as I’d like to be.”

I can excuse the fact that he wishes Eva came home only to him, sure, but the working thing? It’s not uncommon for people to earn a living by working for someone that is not their husband. In fact, some would venture so far as to say that’s normal! [Matthew says: Some would venture so far as to say that that’s more or less how the entire modern consumerism-driven economy has worked for the last few centuries?]

Following this is two very brief scenes – the first has Eva comforting Gideon after a nightmare he can’t remember, and the second is them having “animalistic” sex before work. This leads to a really weird conversation on the way to work:

“Paparazzi,” she said grimly.

I followed her gaze and spotted the photographer aiming a camera out of the open passenger window of his car. Gripping her by the elbow, I led her into the building.

“If I have to start actually styling my hair every day,” she muttered, “you’re dealing with morning wood on your own.”

“Angel,” I tugged her into my side and whispered, “I’d hire a full-time hairdresser for you before I gave up your cunt every morning.”

Words you never thought you’d hear out of anyone’s mouth. And hiring the hairdresser wouldn’t exactly solve the issue of the time to style Eva’s hair…unless the hairdresser is meant to be doing Eva’s hair during the fucking.

She elbowed me in the ribs. “God, you’re crude, you know that? Some women take offense to that word.”

We are only just addressing Gideon’s pathologic use of the word ‘cunt’ now? Too little, too late, book. [Matthew says: How did it take FOUR ENTIRE BOOKS to address this?]

As Gideon approaches his office, this gross out moment happens:

“My stride slowed when I saw the willowy brunette waiting by Scott’s desk.
I steeled myself to deal with my mother again.

Then her head turned and I saw it was Corinne.”

Is Gideon unable to tell who literally anyone is from behind? Also, this is way more disgusting than when he thought that Eva’s doppleganger was her – he’s mistaking his fucking ex-fiance for his mother. DAT NASTY.

It only gets grosser as he sits down to talk with Corinne.

She looked at me. Her eyes weren’t the same shade of blue as my mother’s, but they were close, and their sense of style was similar. Corinne’s elegant blouse and trousers were notably like something I’d once seen my mother wear.

BRB puking guts out.

Anyway, Gideon and Corinne have exactly the conversation you expect them to have where she wants him back, bad-mouths Eva, and Gideon keeps turning her down.

However, Corinne does make one really great point:

“What would you do if Eva said these things to you?” she challenged. “Would you just give up and walk away?”

“It’s not the same.” I raked a hand through my hair, struggling to find the words.

“You don’t understand what I have with Eva. She needs me as much as I need her. For both our sakes, I wouldn’t ever give up trying.”

“I need you, Gideon.”

Gideon has told us and Eva numerous times that if she ever tried to leave him, he’d never stop trying to win her back. Corinne is just doing the same! Why is her obsession less necessary than yours, huh, Gideon? [Matthew says: ‘Cause dicks.]

I do hate Corinne, though, because she keeps basically threatening to attempt suicide again because she has nothing to live for without Gideon. Fuck off, Corinne.

Anyway, Gideon calls Eva after Corinne leaves. He doesn’t tell her about his conversation with Corinne, which is obviously going to lead to an argument later. Ug, Gideon, whyyyy?

Then, because for some reason everyone thinks it’s cool to interrupt a high-powered business man whenever they feel like it, Gideon’s brother Christopher shows up to yell at him for getting engaged to Eva and ruining every chance Six-Ninths has to be successful. If Six-Ninths is relying so heavily on Brett and Eva’s relationship to skyrocket them to success, they are clearly a talentless bunch of numbskulls with no business playing music.

“Do you even comprehend the damage you’ve done? Behind the Music has delayed their special because Sam Yimara no longer owns the rights to the footage he compiled of the band’s early years. Diners, Drive-Ins and Dives can’t include Pete’s 69th Street Bar in their San Diego episode, because it’s being demolished before they can film their segment. And Rolling Stone isn’t interested in pursuing their proposed piece on ‘Golden’ since your engagement was announced. The song loses its interest without the happy ending.”

Then it is not a good song to begin with! Why would people give any shits about this happy ending? Aw, she used to give him blowjobs and now she is giving him blowjobs again, a happy ending in all the ways! [Matthew says: Guys. I just realized something. All this time I thought this band’s shitty cock rock song was like Nickelback, but it’s actually “Hey There, Delilah”. Which makes sense here, because do you remember who even played that song once we found out it was written for a girl who didn’t even remember briefly chatting with the guy at a party? MUSIC BIZ FACTS.]

Christopher insults Gideon and Eva a bit and dares to mock their relationship, so they get into a fistfight. Mercifully, before Christopher leaves Gideon points out the obvious to him:

“For Christ’s sake, Christopher, they’re talented. They don’t need a gimmick to be successful. If you weren’t so damned eager to make me pay for something you’ve imagined I’ve done, you’d be concentrating on better angles than making them into a one-hit wonder.”

It’s really hard for me to be on the same side as Gideon for once, but I think in this one case we can put our differences aside.

The chapter ends with Gideon in therapy talking about how hard it is to be in therapy when he wants to be fucking Eva. Classic Gideon!