I just realized that I forgot to make a new banner to reflect our new bad book, Reflected In You (I promise today’s jokes are all uphill from here). I know we have a certain level of professionalism to maintain, so I’m gonna Photoshop a new one soon as I have some free time. I’m pretty busy watching all of Parks and Recreation on Netflix planning career and housing stuff.
Chapter 2
Okay, so the first chapter was kind of a bust in terms of actually establishing a sequel as opposed to just kind of, you know, being.
Nobody is going to get this joke.
So here’s our list of things that this sequel might be about based on the first chapter (does not include “the ongoing saga of whether Gideon and Eva will be happy together” because that’s not a trilogy of books, that’s a syndicated tv show):
- Eva’s sexually abusive step-brother, Nathan, might return to… be back?
And that’s about all that’s going on! I don’t have high hopes for this subplot, because Sylvia Day has never been able to write about sexual abuse in a way that isn’t horribly offensive. Or, sometimes, in a way where words even make sense:
I’d prefer love over wealth any day, but I suppose that was easy for me to say because I had money – a sizable investment portfolio – of my own. Not that I ever touched it. I wouldn’t. I’d paid too high a price and couldn’t imagine anything worth the cost.
I’ve reread that sentence like twenty times and I’m still not certain what it means. Like, obviously it’s supposed to mean something about how she has that money from the settlement after it came out that her stepbrother was abusing her, but at the level of words forming logical sentences, I’m lost.
Anyway, Eva goes to work.
Megumi, the receptionist, buzzed me through the glass security door and greeted me with a big smile. [...]
“Hey, I said, stopping by her desk. “Got any plans for lunch?”
“I do now.”
“Awesome.” My grin was wide and genuine. As much as I loved Cary and enjoyed spending time with him, I needed girlfriends, too.
Wait, who the hell is Megumi? Ariel talked about this yesterday, but I’m just as baffled by this. Eva has narrated her entire life since she started working at this company, Megumi was never mentioned once in the first book, zero time has passed between the first and second book, and suddenly Eva has a friend named Megumi? Who the hell are you?
Who the hell are y- okay, I should explain. There’s going to be a lot of The Room jokes in this post.
WHERE DID MEGUMI COME FROM? What can explain her sudden appearance? Maybe there’s a supernatural twist coming up with characters that implant themselves in people’s memories without them noticing! OH MY GOD. WHAT IF. Place your bets for when the supernatural plot twist is going to happen, everybody. Don’t write it off yet! It makes as much sense as anything else that happens in these books.
Anyway, speaking of Cary, the friend who Eva is fighting with who makes literally the only unresolved plot point at the end of the last book that the sequel was left to resolve…
I found a text from Cary: I’m sorry, baby girl.
“Cary Taylor,” I sighed. “I love you… even when you’re pissing me off.”
And one paragraph later, these text messages are sent:
Up for a trip to Vegas? Just u and me?
Fuck yeah!
K
And, uh, they seem to be talking again, so literally the only unresolved plot point that was left hanging at the end of the first book is resolved. By page 19. Guys, I’m pretty sure even Fifty Shades Darker held out on its one unresolved plot point longer than that.
Eva goes to work with her boss whatshisname and they have to advertise blueberry-flavored coffee. I really wish this was the plot instead, but nope. Reflected In You continues its Fifty Shades-ripoff status by mirroring the “bring back characters that had one scene in the first book as primary antagonists for no rational reason” formula:
I started an Internet search for Dr. Terrence Lucas, a man who’d clearly rubbed Gideon the wrong way when I’d seen the two men together at dinner the night before.
It’s a good thing Sylvia Day reminded us who he was, because I literally had no idea. He’s that guy who was talking to Eva at dinner when Gideon was ignoring her and talking to Corinne at the end of the last book. Like, on page 294. Then he leaves on page 296. And that is it. Between Terrence suddenly being a way bigger deal than he ever was and Megumi straight up showing up out of nowhere, it looks like it’s literally any character’s time to shine!
Anyway, Eva finds that Dr. Terrence is has been married for twenty-five years to a red-headed woman, which for some reason makes Eva confused why Dr. Terrence and Gideon hate each other, because literally the only explanation that would have made sense to her is if they fought over a brunette for some reason.
inwardly cringing at the thought of seeing a golden-skinned, long-haired brunette. I exhaled my relief when I saw that Mrs. Lucas was a pale-skinned woman with short, bright read hair.
But that left me with more questions. I’d figured it would be a woman who’d caused the trouble between the two men.
None of this makes any sense to me.
The fact was, Gideon and I really didn’t know that much about each other. We knew the ugly stuff – at least he knew mine, I’d mostly guessed his from some pretty obvious clues.
Yes, much to the confusion of myself and Bad Books, Good Times readers, at no point in the first book was Gideon’s past explicitly explained. You can all stop asking me now.
Eva gets a phone call from Magdalene, reminding me how many characters in this book I don’t give a fuck about. She calls Eva to explain some really obvious things about Gideon’s behavior from the dinner party where Eva learned about Corinne, like how Gideon chased after her, which, um, we kind of already know? On account of how he chased after her. Hard to misread that one.
“I owe you one, Eva, for the way I introduced myself. [...] Gideon and I have known each other a long time. Our mothers are best friends. You and I will see each other around, Eva, and I’m hoping we can find a way to avoid any awkwardness.”
Honestly, Magdalene’s revelation at the end of Bared To You that she was being a pathetic jerk to Eva over a dude was my favorite part of the novel, and not in a “I hated this the least” way, but I actually thought it was a nice touch. This is a subplot I’m actually going to read with some interest. Which is a shame, because the main plot is really really stupid: Eva sexts Gideon and then he calls her and makes her talk about it even though she’s going to get lunch with Megumi which is like totally embarrassing because a woman sexted a guy and got herself in “trouble” because her sexuality just isn’t a match for his. That is actually how these books read whenever the female narrator expresses sexual desire: the man has to assert his own sexual desire until the woman becomes intimidated and thus turned on for his reasons and not her own. It is literally a dick waggling contest.
I am so ready for the weekend,” Megumi said with a groan [...]
“Got something fun planned?”
“That remains to be seen.” She sighed and tucked her hair behind her ear. “Blind date,” she explained ruefully.
Who the hell are you?
Okay, to understand these jokes, just go to a midnight showing of The Room. I’ll wait.
Eva and Megumi come back from lunch when suddenly Eva spies Corinne coming out of their building, looking like an impossibly specific description!
She ran a hand over her waist-length hair, which wasn’t quite as sleek as it’d appeared last night when I’d met her. In fact, it looked a little disshelved. [...] I could see why she was fussing with her lipstick – it was smeared. No, more like mashed. As if from a passionate kiss.
Corinne is let into Gideon’s car by his chauffeur, Angus. Eva is devastated! Sylvia Day’s narrative is nonsensical!
The feeling of betrayal – Angus’s and Gideon’s – was so fierce, I couldn’t catch my breath. I swayed on my feet.
“Hey.” Megumi caught my arm to steady me. “And we only had virgin margaritas, lightweight!”
Who ARE you???
