Armada Chapter 13: After ignoring orders and completely fucking things up on the battlefield, Zack goes to meet with Admiral Vance. I was worried that he was going to immediately congratulate Zack on his skills and promote him, but he reasonably (and pretty politely) points out that Zack was an idiot: “I issued that order for […]
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Quick side note before today’s post. Google AdSense is one of our ad services we use, and I noticed yesterday that it put some Donald Trump ads on our blog. I’ve blocked them. Let me know if you’re still seeing any. Fuck Donald Trump. Armada: Chapter 14 Very much not in trouble for anything whatsoever, […]
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One With You Chapter 15 Part 1: My portion of the chapter is essentially the scene at the end of Psycho where they break down the psychology of Norman Bates. At least in Psycho, you were familiar with Norman for the whole film. Whereas, who the fuck is this ‘Hall’ guy? “My dad shoved the photos away. “Was Hall targeting […]
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This is our second-last week of Crossfire EVER, everyone! Last week we wrap up the whole thing! Place your bets now on just how many subplots will be left hanging. I’ll give you a hint: I HAVE COMPLETELY LOST COUNT. One With You: Chapter 15, continued So, when I made that joke in chapter 12 about a […]
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Zack meets his father and is so overwhelmed with emotion that he can’t even finish his reference: I found myself staring at a drop of sweat that had formed on his brow, and then watching as it rolled down the side of his face, as if this detail were proof this was really happening. It […]
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Look, you come up with a title for every single chapter summary of this book. Armada: Chapter 16 Zack’s dad leads Zack to another part of the Moon base, which of course means we’re going to another place named with an 80s pop culture reference that’s a bit of a stretch at best: “Welcome,” my father said, stretching […]
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It’s been done to death, but come on, how could I not address How to Talk to a Girl Wearing Headphones? This beautiful, heaping pile of garbage could not be ignored. Support for How to Talk to a Girl Wearing Headphones: The amazing thing about having waited to write this is now there’s a whole bunch of extra […]
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It took a little longer than we expected, but eBooks for Sweet Valley Confidential and Beautiful Redemption are available now on Amazon! Don’t forget that literally all of our eBooks are part of the deal if you subscribe to our Patreon. (Including the ones that Amazon pulls from time to time. Ugh, Amazon.) Seriously, $1 a month is all it takes […]
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One With You Chapter 16: Everyone continues to mourn the loss of Eva’s mother. Clancy, who in case you didn’t remember is obviously Eva’s mother’s husband’s body guard who helped cover up the fact that Gideon murdered Nathan. DUH. He reveals Monica’s secrets. To Gideon. Not Eva. I still do not fucking understand how these […]
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Ok, everyone. It’s finally here. The last post about the last Crossfire book. I can’t say I’m sad to see Crossfire go, but we started reading this series on-and-off four years ago! Bared To You was one of the first books we read, back in 2012, when Ariel and I were still doing this blog in college. I mean, seriously, we […]
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It’s five of our blog readers’ favorite vaguely-regular feature about the sad books I read when I’m not reading shitty books for this blog! Take a drink every time I describe a character as “broken”. Anyway, before you read the first item in this post: spoilers. Harry Potter and the Cursed Child What’s It About? I don’t […]
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Armada Chapter 17: At dinner, Zack notices that there are some love connections happening between his teammates: I took the last empty seat, between my father and Milo. Graham sat next to Debbie, and only then did I realize from their body language that the two of them were crushing on each other in a […]
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You know the drill. Things aren’t what they appear to be, the aliens don’t make sense, the 80s were great, blah blah blah. Armada: Chapter 18 Zack’s dad takes Zack to a secluded, off-limits part of the moon base: the only spot without any EDA cameras or microphones. Naturally, the first thing they do with […]
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Calendar Girl (January): Now that Crossfire has left a racy hole in our hearts, Matthew and I have decided to read Calendar Girl, and dive into the world of high class call girls. My mother actually recommended this book to us; she volunteers at a library and said it’s constantly being borrowed, and it looks absolutely dreadful. It’s like catnip […]
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Ads by Project Wonderful! Your ad here, right now: $0 Calendar Girl (January) Chapter 1: Our story begins with our jaded protagonist explaining she doesn’t believe in true love because of 4 terrible past experiences. Let’s see, there was: Taylor. My high-school sweetheart. We were together all through high school. He was an all-star baseball […]
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Ads by Project Wonderful! Your ad here, right now: $0 To clarify, since I’m sure someone is confused about this, this is about the erotic novel series Calendar Girl, NOT the movie Calendar Girls with Helen Mirren. Calendar Girl (January): Chapter 2 Mia takes a look at the profile of her first assignment. We’re done learning about […]
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Ads by Project Wonderful! Your ad here, right now: $0 Forget bonus post day! This is URGENT, everyone. The Fifty Shades Darker movie trailer is here!!!! Oh my god you guys, it’s here!!! This Valentines Day, my husband and I will definitely be hitting our local theatre so I can take copious notes again. Who knows, maybe […]
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Ads by Project Wonderful! Your ad here, right now: $0 Is this book over yet? I miss House of Night. Zack heads to the observation deck where Milo and Shin are getting high and playing Dark Side of the Moon because of course they are. “Now you’re getting stoned out of your gourds?” I said. “While listening to Dark Side of […]
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Ads by Project Wonderful! Your ad here, right now: $0 Armada: Chapter 20 The first real outer space dogfight is finally here! And to think we only had to read three-fourths of a book about video games secretly training the population about outer space dogfights to get here! Zack, his dad, the two other EDA […]
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Ads by Project Wonderful! Your ad here, right now: $0 Calendar Girl Chapter 3: Mia gets acclimated to her luxurious new job: The pool was heated and refreshing. I used the time I had to work on my tan and get some exercise by way of laps in the pool. Weston, or “Wes” as he […]
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