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The Master Straight Up Kidnaps Pamela Now: Pamela Part 5
So Ariel and I were talking, and we decided I should just add quotation marks to the quotes I pull from Pamela (Written before people really used quotation marks! Crazy!) to make it easier for people...
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Prepare to be Puzzled: Round 3
To recap, here is the Paul Sloane puzzle from last week: One day a man received a parcel in the post. Inside, he found a human left arm. He examined it carefully and then repacked it and sent it on to...
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Matthew Watches The Room 14: Oh Hi, Mark
Woo! It’s been a little while, hasn’t it? But fear not! We’re back watching The Room and we return to a fantastic scene. Johnny: I did not hit her! It’s not true! It’s bullshit! I did not hit her!...
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Hey, Did you Know Stevie Rae is Southern?: Betrayed Chapter 24
We received yet another hysterical spam post that I thought I’d share with you guys. The most troubling thing about this comment is perhaps the fact that porn still wants to keep in touch via AOL. This...
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So Stevie Rae Is Still Pretty Dead: Betrayed Chapter 25
Man, Stevie Rae dying really took over this book’s plot. I can’t even remember what the book was about before Stevie Rae died! The joke is the book wasn’t about anything. Sorry, I don’t know how...
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Gideon and Eva Have a Really Moving Conversation, Then Everything Goes Back...
Previously, Gideon and Eva were reunited with the rest of their group at the mysterious Terminus where all is not as it seems…I’m so sorry, you guys, this isn’t The Walking Dead. I was just in denial....
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Pamela Sows The Seeds For Her Escape, Sews This Entire Book Inside Her...
In “Fun Things Matthew Did That Are Worth Sharing With Strangers On The Internet” news, I went on a bar crawl to every borough in NYC last weekend! Another fun thing that I did was point out to people...
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Zoey Vs Neferet, Let the Undermining Begin: Betrayed Chapter 26
Zoey had a dream that alllll zombie ghosts would be treated as actual plot points and not just cast aside. A dream that all ugly losers would be judged not by their losery appearance, but by the fact...
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Heath Is In Trouble, As Is Zoey+Erik Night: Betrayed Chapter 27
Guys, we only have three weeks left of House of Night #2: Betrayed! How are people feeling about House of Night so far? I mean, obviously, everybody hates it, but do you hate it like Zoey hated Heath...
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Someone Finally Accuses Gideon of Being Abusive, Gets Told: Entwined with You...
Last time, Eva and Gideon had a really moving conversation, which quickly went south when Eva had to go and make it all about anal sex. Come on, Eva there’s a time and a place. Also, minor characters...
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The Book Gets Its Jacob And Gets Rid Of Him With Ruthless Efficiency: Pamela...
Previously on Pamela, Pamela’s been kidnapped by her Master, but is working on an escape plan with the local clergyman, Mr. Williams, who could not possibly throw a loop in the Pamela-Mister B——...
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Matthew Watches The Room 15: Denny’s In Love With Lisa Too, Why Not
So this week’s scene is actually the second half of the last one. As soon as Mark left I was all, “Hooray! I’m done! THANK GOD.” And then this week I resumed the video and realized I didn’t actually...
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Zoey Redbird: Vampyre, Master of All Affinities, Cowgirl: Betrayed Chapter 28
Previously, Zoey telepathically links with Heath to find out where he is post-kidnapping. He reveals that he’s being held by the group of zombie ghosts, which, shock of all shocks, includes Stevie Rae....
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Zoey Defeats The Undead With The Power Of Human Feelings: Betrayed Chapter 29
Only two more weeks of House of Night: Betrayed after this! So do you think we’ll actually find out who did any betraying? [Ariel says: Erik was betrayed by Zoey - that much we know!] Yesterday we...
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Search Engine Optimisation: Entwined with You Chapter 8
If anyone out there ever does a search for “Entwined with You Search Engine Optimisation” we’re definitely going to be number one, I can just smell the success, motherfuckers! [Matthew says: We're...
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Pamela Tries To Kill Herself, Is Still Unintentionally Funny: Pamela Part 8
I was really hoping that today we’d learn that the Supreme Court’s decision on the Hobby Lobby case declaring that corporations are more people than women was actually part of Facebook’s social...
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Matthew Watches The Room 16: Lisa Is Not Subtle, Is Also Tearing Johnny Apart
Did you forget this movie takes place in San Francisco? If so, Tommy Wiseau included yet another shot that will help you remember! Apparently. Lisa and Michelle are lounging about in the middle of the...
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Dramatic Reveals: Betrayed Chapter 30
Previously: “Oh, Zo, you know you love me.” [Heath] winked at me and I couldn’t help smiling back at him. “Fine. I love you.” “What’sss happening…” the gross Elliott creature hissed. That line both...
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Nyx Ex Machina, or Begun, The Neferet-Zoey War Has: Betrayed Chapters 31 and 32
American readers: happy Fourth of July! Non-American readers: regular fourth of July! [Ariel says: American readers living abroad - what are you doing to celebrate? I feel very sad that there are no...
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Gideon and Eva Have Sex in Gideon’s Secret Lair: Entwined with You Chapter 9
In case you couldn’t tell by the very appropriately titled post Search Engine Optimisation, in chapter 8, Eva gave Gideon advice on how to optimize his charity foundation’s website. Despite being a...
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