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The President Knows About Jack And Annie For Some Reason: Abe Lincoln at Last...
Hopefully you’re enjoying our return to the world of Magic Tree House, even though we skipped the forty-five books in between this one and the last one we read. If only we could have done that for...
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Why? Why is This Book Not Over Yet? Allegiant Chapter 39:
Allegiant Chapter 39: Tris We open with Matthew (#NotOurMatthew) clarifying this magical serum that magically targets specific memories. Because the more we talk about it, the more I’m going to buy...
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Tobias Solves Everything But Not At All: Allegiant Chapter 40
Don’t worry. Only 130 pages left. Here are a list of things that are almost as long as how many pages are left of Allegiant, but the entire remainder of Allegiant is actually still longer: The Old Man...
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Jack Acts Like a Complete Turd Muffin: Abe Lincoln At Last Chapters 7-9
In what was possibly one of the darkest cliffhangers in Magic Treehouse history, we left off wondering if a child had just died after being kicked in the head by a horse. There was blood trickling down...
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Actually Abe Lincoln At Last: Abe Lincoln At Last Chapters 9-12
Hopefully you enjoyed seeing fuck all of Abraham Lincoln. This time next week we’ll be reading E. L. James’s Gray, which will certainly be an interesting transition from Magic Tree House. Chapter 10:...
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Wait, There’s Sex in This Series?: Allegiant Chapters 41 & 42
Allegiant Chapter 41: Tris The chapter opens with a really peculiar and nonsensical juxtaposition: I stand next to a mop in a storage room in the basement; I stand in the wake of what I just told...
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Plans To Change The World Are In Motion Again: Allegiant Chapters 43 and 44
So did everyone already read Gray? Is everyone terrified for us to start reading it next week? Chapter 43: Tris Tris kicks off the chapter off honestly, at least. The emergency council meeting is more...
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When Christian Met Ana…Again: Grey Chapter 1
So as you all probably know, Grey isn’t simply a retelling of Fifty Shades of Grey from Christian’s perspective, it’s also a re-imagining of the Terminator franchise in which a concerned robot from the...
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Christian Stalks Ana To A Hardware Store: Grey Chapter 2
So with our first Grey post being Ariel’s (and also being totally batshit, because this is a real book that exists), I didn’t have a chance to go into some preliminary stuff about Grey that, oh my...
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Shocking Twists and Turns (JK): Allegiant Chapters 45 & 46
On the days we write about Allegiant, our readership just plummets. All you people want is Grey! Allegiant Chapter 45: Tris Caleb is examining serums because when it comes down to it, isn’t this whole...
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Tobias Talks An Antagonist Into Just Giving Up, Like This Plot Has: Allegiant...
I know, I know, it’s not Grey. We could all use a break from that. Already. Chapter 47: Tris Over on Tris’s side of the climax, her plan to sneakily take Caleb on his suicide mission to the weapons lab...
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Christian Hates When People are Pleasant to Him: Grey Chapter 3
Oh my goodness, this is the best review of Grey. I mean, it’s not chapter by chapter or anything awesome like that, but is it a scathing and nasty review of this book? HELL YEAH. Apologies if any of...
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The Story Manages To Become LESS Romantic, Somehow: Grey Chapter 4
You guys gotta check out #AskELJames hashtag on twitter. It is gloriously on point. Mara Wilson retweed some good ones. In other news, I’ve been traveling the last couple days and only have my tablet...
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Tris Dies: Allegiant Chapters 49 & 50
Can I just leave it at the title of this post? Allegiant Chapter 49: Tris The death serum smells like smoke and spice. What kind of death serum even is this, it sounds like a burnt curry serum. Did a...
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Tris Died: Allegiant Chapters 51-54
So now we can all speculate wildly over whether the only reason this is the only book in the series to be told from Tris and Tobias’s perspective is because there needed to be a way to tell the...
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Christian and Elliot Discuss Elliot’s Penis: Grey Chapter 5
Grey: Friday, May 20, 2011 Christian explains that the over-the-top gift he sent Ana was meant to be a way to achieve closure. Why you need closure for a flirtation that totalled about an hour’s worth...
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Christian Grey’s Penis! (From the Perspective of Christian Grey): Grey Chapter 6
Guess who’s moved to a new apartment and has internet again! Guess whose roommates let him name the wireless network! It was me! Grey: Saturday, May 21, 2011 Previously, Christian Grey kidnapped a...
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The End of the Book: Allegiant Chapters 55 & 56
Allegiant Chapter 55: Tobias (Because Tris is Dead) Tobias is, unsurprisingly, still sad about Tris’ death. Those lost in the memory serum haze are gathered into groups and given the truth: that human...
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Obligatory Flash Forward Epilogue: Allegiant Epilogue
Guess what? We’re finally done with Divergent! Or at least we will be, once we learn what everyone’s doing two and a half years after the story ended, which is the obligatory move for all fiction...
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Ana Gets Acquainted With Christian’s Penis: Grey Chapter 7
Grey: Sunday, May 22, 2011 Christian and his cock have a much-needed regroup after their “first vanilla fuck” with Ana. There are definitely some advantages to having her in my bed. Grey. Stop this...
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